Over
by AlyshaNemesis
Summary: Over... The last battle is defeated, the last blood is shed. The last tear is cried.: extract One chara is musing over the end of the last battle. Sad. translation from my german fic :Vorbei: Prequel to :Too late:


_A/N: I originally wrote this story in german and later translated it to english. The german version may be found on this page too, it's named "Vorbei"_

_It's rather sad, so don't like don't read. _

_Special thanks to my wonderful beta libaka who corrected this in no time! _

_Anyway, enjoy the story (and maybe you feel like sending me a review?)_**  
** xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxox

**Over**

Over...

The last battle is defeated, the last blood is shed. The last tear is cried.

It's over. Everything is ending now. Love, friendship, solitude. Hope. Life...

What's left for me anyway? For me... No more US, never again.

It's all over. All gone. Everything ends. Still, it continues...

Now I'm standing here, looking at the last ruins of the last battle. The last misery is gone—along with the last happiness. Silent mourning caresses me, emptiness, darkness.

It's all over at last, still, I can't be glad about it. I'm not even relieved. I guess I simply lost this ability just like I forgot how to feel. Slowly but inevitably, emotions changed to some kind of luxury, something I've never been able to afford all my life.

It's all over now, finally. He is beaten, destroyed, eradicated. And this time, it's forever. Nothing, not even the slightest possibility is left for him—we won.

We, the Order, I, the Order. Because that's the way it is. Nothing remains for me. He is gone. What ambiguity!

A laugh escapes my throat. Laughing? I never knew I still could... Yet, I always had this certain callous humour that enabled me to share the mischievous laughing of fate.

He is gone. He, the most powerful and most horrible wizard ever, He, the Order of the phoenix, lonely warrior of light in times of darkness, is gone.

Over. Well and truly over! I still can't believe it, can't realise it.

Cold is creeping in; silence is closing in deep inside. That's it. That's how it ends, is it? Well, nobody would have figured that. Nobody.

"Neither can live while the other survives", Oh, how apt this prophecy was! How excellent, how felicitous! How literally it had to be taken...

Neither would survive... Neither the one side nor the other, nobody who came to that battlefield would.

Everyone of them is dead—Harry, Hermione, Ron, Severus, Draco... They died, just like Voldemort and his Deatheaters did. Everybody died... Everybody...

I don't know what exactly took place. How it happened. I was too late... I wasn't there... And now I hate myself for not being there, for not being killed with them, for not having sacrificed myself with them... For what remains for me? What's left? I don't have anything, anything at all... I only am a shadow, like half the man I used to be, unable to feel, to exist... I can't cope with this...

Just why had it to be the day after the full moon? Why, for heaven's sake?

It's carved in my mind, burned in my sight: The memory of the last moments with them.

"Remus, something happened... They got Ginny and Hermione at Diagon's Alley... Alastor's dead! We gotta go, no time's gotta be wasted!"

I grabbed my wand without any word at all and wanted to follow them when I caught Harry's look. The sadness in his eyes was almost unbearable as he said: "Remus, you'd better stay. It's the day after the full moon, you're too weak... Besides, someone's gotta fill the ministry in. Go, tell them where we are, what happened... Maybe they'll send help! And…take care of James, will you? Please..."

I'll never forget the look in his eyes, faithful, pleading, as he bid me farewell. All I managed was nodding helplessly. "Take care of you!" was all I could say, well, rather spit out.

Then they were gone...

That was the last time I ever saw them. After I filled in some guy from the ministry I came here immediately. But everything was over by then.

A large cloud of dust hovered depressive over the field where everything ended... And there they were. Looking at the sky with eyes wide open. They still lie there. Some smiling, other's horrified.

And Harry's looking so very peaceful...

Lily and James will be happy to see him again. They just might not have expected that it would happen that fast! And Sirius... Gods, just how I miss him! I'm almost jealous of Harry that he gets to see him again first... They're all "there", together. I'm alone again, as usual. Excluded and lonely. I guess some things just never change, no matter what might happen.

I was alone then—an introverted child, a nerd, a werewolf. Later on, the last of the Marauders, the only true friends I ever had. All my life I've been losing everything, then again even more... I keep on losing no matter what...

Everything's over. Restarts. It'll end again! An eternal circle of ending and starting all over again. It's over. And in the end, I'm alone. Always... When will it end? Just, will I ever find my peace? When may I rest…

It's over.

Over...

I stare at the battlefield, unbelievingly, still unable to comprehend.

Steps behind me. A hand slides on my shoulder. "Come, Remus", I hear a small voice whisper and I don't have to turn around to recognise her. I sigh. After all, I'm not all alone. At least one other person shares my fate. She, too, has lost everything.

"Think of James..." she urges me. I consider. She's right... I'm everything that's left for 'lil James now. A grim laugh escapes my mouth. Suddenly the irony of the situation pops into my mind, hits me like a flash of lightning. Unwillingly I have to think about an old saying: Like father, like son... Harry himself lost both parents when he was about James' age... Lost them because of the same man, that caused today's massacre. It's unfair... Life is unfair. Again I stubbornly laugh to fate that keeps on sneering at me rigidly.

She stiffens when she hears me laughing like that. She must think I completely lost my mind now!

Finally I turn to her, to comfort her with a smile. It turns out as an awkward, helpless grimace.

"It's okay, Narcissa. I just need...some time, I think. Everything's just dreadful." My voice fades in a whisper. I'm still stunned with shock.

She nods in understanding. She, too, has lost everything; saw her family perishing in a war that was not hers and that she never wanted. We both lost everything... No matter what we do, we're always on the loser's side...

Once again, I let my eyes wander over the field, force myself to look one last time at every single one of my friends lying there, peacefully, smiling jubilant. They do have their peace. For them, everything's over.

I sigh and turn away, prepared to once again hold my head up high and spit my every laughter into the face of destiny.

For them, it's over...

For me, it has just begun...

_The End (?)_

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

_A/N: That's it. But if you liked it, there's a sequel (which I originally wrote in english and then translated back to german--just how weird's that? ;) ) It's called "Too late" (german version: "Zu spät"_)

_Thanks for reading!_


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